Love Me - Chapter Thirty Four

I get to my feet and walk out of the bathroom. I'm still shaking from the attack. It was so close I can't believe that I'm still alive and intact. I feel my head start to spin as my knees grow weak. Dimitri grabs ahold of me to steady me. My dark night has come to rescue me. 

Dimitri moves in front of me and then drops to his knee. He holds my hand and then rests his head on my belly. I almost want to jump, but something deep down starts pulling at my heart. The feelings for Dimitri are resurfacing. I can't do this, I can't let my heart fall for him.

"Emily, please don't pull away from me," he says with a sadness I have not seen him show before. This is a side I'm not used to seeing. He has always been strong and confident with his emotions. "Does it not matter what I have told you? Please, Emily, I can't lose you again," he begs. Before thinking, I reach up to run my fingers through his hair to comfort him but catch myself. "I can't do this. I can't live this way," I whisper. 

He stands up as I drop to my knees. He places his hands on my shoulders. I can feel that he's still sad without even looking at him. "I can protect you," he says. "No, you can't, I will never be safe as long as I'm alive. Why don't you just kill me?" I sigh. "Emily, I could never hurt you. Don't you see that I can't live without you?" Dimitri whispers.

Suddenly, without warning, he pulls me up from the floor, dragging me by the hand out of the room. "Where are we going?' I ask as I try to keep up. He doesn't answer as he unlocks a door and leads me into a beautiful bedroom.

"This is where I sleep, you will be safe here with me. I want you to be with me all the time. I'm stunned as I wrap my head around this. "Is this where you and Jen sleep?" I ask with anger laced in my voice.

I see Dimitri took it just as I thought he would. He guessed what I was thinking. "You think! No, I have......not slept with Jen like you think. Yes, she sleeps in my room but not with me," he hisses. I jump and find myself stepping back away from him.

"Do I mean that little to you! Did I not show you that I loved you?" he shouts as he shows his fangs.

"I'm............sorry," I gasp as I step back from him.

Dimitri's face softens. "Emily, look, this is a little hard to just explain all at once. It all happened so fast. I went down the day that we fought with the Nightwalkers. I thought you were dead. When I woke up, I realized they had turned me into one of them. They tried to convince me that they killed you with the rest of your family. I could not come to terms with your death and this new life that had been presented to me. I went to end my life when your sister stopped me. She revealed that you had escaped and was still being hunted. This gave me hope but also scared me. I knew they would not give up until they found you. I had to find you before they did. 

My one hope became a reality when I spotted you that one night down by the beach. I had to follow you to make sure that it was, in fact, you. The purple hair and your looks have changed a little. When I was sure I had to have you with me," he says.

"So you have been looking for me all this time?" I ask. "Not at first. I had to adjust to what I am. I had to get myself under control and to deal with what happened. I will tell you the story one day but not tonight. I have not been with no other since you, I have no room for anyone else. When I came here, I was forced to choose a bond. Jen is my bond, she is linked to me by a spell that keeps her safe and for whatever I choose. I have chosen to be kind to her. She shares my room, and that is all. I feed off her when I am not able to hunt, and that is hardly at all. She talked to me to keep me company when I was lonely, but that's it," he says. I'm floored.

Dimitri pulls me into his arms, holding me tight, and I find that it's a comfort this time. "I'm sorry for all of this. I wish I could have been stronger while I was human. That we could have lived a happy life together with your family, but they won. I will not let them have you," he says."Hannah said that once they found out that I was here, they would never allow us to be together. With your bond with Jen, you will never be able to protect me like you can with her," I whisper as I inhale his scent."Let me worry about that," he says. 

"Take a walk with me," he says as he grabs my hand, lacing his fingers in mine. He leads me outside with only the stars lighting our way. It's a beautiful night with a warm breeze that flows through my hair. "Let's spend some time together, so you can get comfortable around the new me and not what I use to be," he says.

"There is so much I would love to know, but I just don't know if I can love you as a Nightwalker," I tell him. I peek up at him, and he's not surprised. I was expecting a hurt look, but he's not. He's got almost a small smile playing on his lips.

"There is much I want to tell you. I think you will see everything in a different light when you know everything. Let's just take it slow," Dimitri says as he smirks at me. Get to know him better, what else is there to know other than he's a Nightwalker that drinks blood. I can't help but feel like he is hiding something from me, but what could it be?  

 He comes to a stop and turns to me. He runs his cold fingers along my cheek that sends chills down me. It's got me excited but weary at the same time. I lean into his hand as I close my eyes. I try to remember him like he was before he was changed. I feel my heart yearn for his touch. This is something I can't seem to wrap my head around. Am I damaged beyond love? I have no idea. I don't know if it's even possible to love him. I want to deep down, but I have no idea if I can. 

"Emily," Dimitri snaps me out of my thoughts. "Come, I want to show you something," She says as he leads me around the house. When we get to the back of the house, he sits down on the ground, then motions for me to join him. I sit down beside him, he pulls me to him so that we are arm to arm. He leans in as I catch my breath. He points to the sky as he shows me the constellation of stars. 

"I see it, I call out to Dimitri. He follows my hand to another constellation of stars. He leans closer to where I can feel his breath on my bare shoulder. I feel a chill run over me. Then I'm hit with a drop of rain. I blink as another hits my cheek. 

Dimitri pulls me up, and we run toward the house to get out of the rain. 

We bust through the door, and he's smiling at me with water dripping off him. He's wet and smiling, and it's a beautiful site to see him carefree and happy with me. 

I laugh for the first time in a long time. I throw my head back and giggle like a schoolgirl."What's is so funny?" Dimitri asks me with a smirk on his face. I can't stop laughing to answer him. "Well, if I knew dragging you out in the rain would make you so happy, I would have done it sooner," he laughs. "Oh Dimitri," I giggle. 

Dimitri grabs me crushing me to him. His lips kiss me fiercely as I freeze in shock. I gasp between his kisses and feel myself being pulled in. My mind is racing, as my body starts to betray me. A small moan escapes my lips. 

Dimitri releases me, and I'm almost frozen. In that kiss, I felt it. His love, his world, all ready to be laid out for me. I'm hit with emotions that almost choke me. Here it is, I must decide to either accept him like this or leave him forever.